A Doll's House

I'm in the process of reading the play A Doll's House for one of my summer reading projects(gotta love those!). For a while I couldn't figure out what the title had to do with the play because, well, the plot has nothing to do with a doll house. So this morning when I was writing a journal of Act 2 it came to me. For those of you that haven't read this play, let me give you a brief explanantion. It's about this family in the 40s. The husband, Torvald, just got a promotion at his job. All his wife, Nora cares about is money and gaining material things. Since Torvald got a promotion he wants to fire one of the workers under him. This man, Krogstad, starts blackmailing Nora so she will help him not get fired. So, Nora's dreams of gaining a richer life start to fade. Have you figured out the reason for the title? A doll house is a fake reality. You can pretend to have the perfect life in it, but it's not your real life. Nora was living in a doll house, so to speak. This got me thinking. People sometimes live in a fake reality. They think their lives are going a certain way, but really it's the complete opposite. Before I went to Ecuador, I think I was living in my own doll house. It was my perfect little world. But after going on that trip and experiencing the things that I did, that doll house is destroyed, and that's a good thing. It changed my perception of everything. I'm not as judgmental towards people. I can't stand how materialistic our society is. There is a world outside my own. It's a shame that some people never realize that.

Time

Today I was listening to the song Abracadavers by The Classic Crime. It's a great song, but I never really read that deep into it. But today, two of the lines really stuck out to me. "It seems we're beautifully made and designed. But it's a shame we can be so blind." This is very true. We are beautifully made, but how many of us forget that on a regular basis? We live in a world that always tells us no. We are not beautiful. You will never succeed. It can get really frustrating sometimes. We are blinded by our imperfections and that's all we see. The things we aren't. The things we can't do. I have met people that have almost nothing, yet they have joy in their lives. It's because they remember this: They are beautiful. They are loved. They have hope in something bigger. In the words of Bradley Hathaway, "If hope were not so, I would not choose to live." I have that hope. I need it. We all need it. The next time I start to get the wool of life pulled over my eyes, I'll think of how beautiful God has made me. And I will see clearly again.

Rain

It's raining today. When I woke up this morning and looked out the window I thought, Yes! I don't have to mow the lawn now! I really do like rain. The sound, the smell of it, how it falls to the ground. Except when it's storming. I don't like storms. Rain brings life back to the world. It's like a big wake up call for everything. Today, I think the rain gave me a bit of a wake up call. It gave me new life in a sense. I don't know why exactly, but I feel different. In about 5 weeks, I'm going to begin my senior year of high school. Everyone says high school goes by fast; now I know what they mean. While it is kind of bittersweet to be starting this journey, I know that it's far from over. New things are going to be happening. My life doesn't stop at high school. If it did, that would be really bad! At this point, I feel like I'm ready for this. It's been a good ride, and now it's almost over. So for anyone else who is at this point, I hope you are ready for this too.
Kathleen

Normal

Last week I spent 8 days in Quito, Ecuador. When I came back, culture shock can't even begin to describe how strange everything seemed. First off, in Ecuador, traffic is crazy. Let me out it this way: stoplights are optional. Turn signals are optional. Stop signs are optional. Beeping is greatly accepted and two lanes roads can be one lane roads if needed. So yesterday morning when I was driving to the driving range I was wondering why none of that was going on. As I got closer to my destination, I suddenly became angry. I thought, Why am I doing this? I just got back from Ecuador yesterday, and I'm already doing things I did before I left! Does it happen this fast? Going back to normal? I don't want things to go back to normal! Two days ago I was playing soccer with street kids and giving life to a community with 60% unemployment. Now I'm driving to a golf course that I can't even afford to play at! Have I forgotten everything I've done? And then I pulled into the parking lot of the golf course. It was packed. There was a huge tournament going on. I couldn't even get in. It was like God's way of saying, "You haven't forgotten. This is the new normal. Now go home and rest." I was still really tired from the 10 hours of traveling the day before. Driving home, I felt a sense of completness. Even though things are going to go back to normal eventually, it won't be all the way normal. I have all these memories and experiences that have changed me as a person. I have a whole new attitude towards life. I don't care how cliche that sounds because it's true. So I hope you know what your normal is. Will it change people when they see you? Only you know that answer.
Kathleen