Life, Love, and Things of That Nature

So it's been about a month since I've posted something on here. It's kind of scary to me how quickly life can catch up with us and we can forget about things. I feel like this blog helps me remember what's important to me, and when I realized it was starting to fall to the wayside, I knew that that wasn't right. I need to keep writing it. I like having this outlet to share my thoughts. My life has been extremely busy these past four weeks. Let's see if I can recap it as briefly as possible:

Auditions for my school's spring play were held. We are doing The Diary of Anne Frank. I tried out and got the part of Miep Gies, one of the people who helped hide the Franks, so I'm excited about that. My theatre class is also putting on a show, Opal's Baby, which I'm an understudy for. Second semester is in full swing now and I'm starting to count down the days! Only four more months...

Now, back to what I want to talk about today. I was listening to music a few days ago and I started thinking about how many songs there are that are about love. Thousands of them. Personally, I think sometimes the music industry has milked the idea if love a little too much. We sing about looking for love, finding it, losing it, regreting it, wanting revenge on it, dreaming of it again, wanting the love that we can't have; you get the picture. And it's not just music that has stretched love beyond the limit. I think our society has turned love into something that it was never meant to be. It doesn't even sound like a word anymore; we've used it so much. And it can mean a lot of different things. I could say that I love pizza and that I love my mom in the same sentence, but doesn't that sound a little odd?

I think the reason behind all this is one simple explanation: We long for love so much that we are willing to compromise and strip it down to the bone to get it. No matter how warped or twisted, if it's there, we'll take it. We've left no stone unturned in our search, and I think we've lost our way.

Real love is not what we've made it to be. It's not superficial or blantantly erotic. This is what I think real love is. Real love is when someone cares for you and wants the best for you. They share in your triumphs and support you in your hardships. They know everything about you. All your dreams, fears, passions, all your strange little habits and quirks. They know your good side and bad side. They've seen you when you are brave and when you are weak, and yet they still love you with all their being. They won't walk away. They will stay with you. They would die for you.

Now, you might be saying, "That's really great, but that's impossible. No one can love anybody that much." Oh, yes they can! I've seen it happen. There is someone who has this kind of love for you. He wants to be near you. He longs for you every day. And he did die for you.

God's love is a wonderful reminder that we are worthy of love. I also whole-heartedly believe that this kind of love can exist between two people. It's not just a hopeless romantic's dream. While it's not easy, the outcome is more rewarding than anything Hollywood or Nashville could dish out.

Forgiveness

Last week at church, a man in our congregation talked about forgiveness. As an example, he used the story of King David and Bathsheba. All it took was one small look at her for David to fall into a spiral of sin. With her husband off at war, there was nothing stopping him from sleeping with her. Then she became pregnant. So David had her husband brought home to be with her so everyone would think he was the father. But he wouldn't go into his house. He slept on the steps of the palace. David panicked. He had Bathsheba's husband put on the front lines of the battle so he would be killed. He was now able to marry Bathsheba, but the damage had been done. David knows what he has done. So does Bathsheba. And so does God.

In one of the Psalms, David is crying out to God for forgiveness. The guilt he had been carrying was tearing him apart. He couldn't live with it. David knew his transgressions were great. He needed God to help him. God forgave him of his sins.
In the next Psalm, he praises God for his loving power and forgiveness. This is so wonderful to me. No matter how many times I mess up, miss the mark, lash out, God will forgive me if I ask. He will cast my sins "as far as the east is from the west." They're gone, forgotten.

So this brings up a question.
If God will forgive us of all our sins, why do some people think that their sin is too great to be forgiven? I've never quite understood how people are able to think this. I've been a Christian since I was five. I've never had that experience. It hurts me to know that some people have so much grief over what they've done that they think they are unforgiveable. They think nothing can save them.

When Jesus was on the cross, he took away all the sins of the entire world. All the sins of the past, present, and future. He took away my sins over 2000 years before I committed them! Every bad and terrinble thing you can think of, Jesus put upon himself. I think that's the reason why he said "It is finished." Our sin was finished.

Books!

I'm a complete and total bookworm. I've been known to read a book in a day. At the moment, there are quite a few books that I really want to read. First, I'm in the process of reading the Harry Potter books for the first time in my life. I'm thoroughly enjoying them, along with the movies. Although, I read the first four books over Christmas break, so I'm kind of on a Harry Potter overload right now. When you have a dream that you turned into Draco Malfoy, that's probably a sign that you need to take a little break. In school my AP Lit class is reading Hamlet. I'm not ashamed to say that I am a Shakespeare fan. His plays are little on the long side, but once you are able to understand the language they're really good. I just finished reading a book of poetry by Walt Whitman. I have to say, Walt knows his stuff. Great imagery and emotion. At the moment I'm reading The Almost True Story of Ryan Fisher. It's not first rate literature, but it's a really funny story so far. And it's a good contrast when I want to go on holiday from Hogwarts. One thing I've come to realize, is that there are a lot of poets, playwrights ,and writers that inspire me. I'm thankful for their ideas that they chose to put down on a page, because they now help me put my ideas to paper. Written words can sometimes be more powerful than spoken ones.

Decade

The new year is less than 2 hours away. Although, most of you probably won't read this until tomorrow. It is the end of a decade. These past ten years have been filled with many things. When it started, I was in third grade. I didn't really understand what the big deal was about it being a new millennium. All I remember about it was that I stood on the back of our friends' porch and banged on pots and pans at midnight. Now, I'm almost 18, going to graduate from high school, and am planning on going to bed shortly after, or possibly before, midnight. I've never really been that much of a celebrator on New Year's Eve. It's the beginning of a new journey for some of us. Earlier this evening I wasn't quite feeling like myself. I thought that I knew what I wanted to do with my life, and for the first time, I questioned if I was making the right decision. It kind of scared me a little. It's tough not knowing what's ahead of us. What I do know, is that God already knows what's coming around the bend. He has big plans for me. It's such a comfort knowing that. Those words were lovingly given to me by my mom, another comfort in my life. The next words I'm going to tell you came from one of my favorite movies, Dan in Real Life. Dan is a newspaper columnist. In one of his articles he states, When you ask a young person, What are your plans? What are your plans for your life? I would tell them, plan to be surprised. Good advice, Dan. Wise words indeed.

Comments on the Holidays

Merry Christmas everyone! My holiday has been really great this year. I hope yours is too. It wasn't just the gift giving that made it special. My family is some of the most amazing people I know. Spending time with them is something that I really cherish. My grandma, who is affectionately known as Grammy, is a very talented seamstress. Every year she makes all of the grankids a gift. This year, she passed out a white fabric bag with a red bow to all of us. Before we opened them, she said, "Your gifts are gold colored this year. We want you to know that no matter where you all go in life, you will always be worth more than gold to us." I got a small lump in my throat as I opened mine. Inside was a gold pillow in the shape of the letter K. My cousins all got a pillow with their initial as well. It's one of the best gifts I've ever gotten. This new year is going to bring some changes for all of us. Knowing that someone cares for you and will be there is a very comforting feeling.

Christmastime is Here

I really do love Christmas. Although this year, I feel like it's taken me longer to get into the Christmas spirit. Something has put a bit of a damper on it, and I'm quite sure what it is. Maybe it's the slue of commercials that have turned the holidays into one big shopping spree. I'm not denying the fact that Christmas does involve some form of shopping, but sometimes I feel that it's gotten out of hand. Or maybe it's because it hasn't snowed yet. I live in Ohio. In the snow belt. So where is it? I want to go skiing! Or it could be the fact that all my teachers decided to have tests and projects due during the last week before break. I just finished writing a 7-page literature analysis. Too. Many. Quotes. Don't worry, there is a point to this.

What I'm saying is that a lot of us have forgotten what the holidays are for. I mean, we all know it's to celebrate Jesus's birth, but it's a lot deeper than that. When Jesus was born, there was no Christmas tree. No fire burning in the fireplace, no holiday specials on TV. He was born in a barn. In a manger. Do you know what a manger is? It's a feed trough. Jesus was born in a box that animals eat out of. Speaking of animals, there would have been quite a few in that barn. So there's dirt. And straw. Manure and dust. It would have been filthy in there. This is where our Savior was born. A filthy, cold stable. It wasn't extravagant or flashy. It was humble. It was quiet. I think that this was an example of how we should celebrate Christmas. Keep it simple. I'm not saying don't get a tree or not decorate. I like those parts of it. If we remember what really happened that first Christmas, I think that it will help us not get so caught up.

Me Too

I decided to re-read a book I had read a couple of years ago. I wanted to really make sense of it, figure out what message the writer was trying to put across. Several pages in, a passage jumped out at me.

"Some of the most comforting words in the universe are "me too". That moment when you find out that your struggle is also someone else's struggle, that you're not alone, and that others have been down the same road."

I don't think there is any other phrase in the world that can affect people as much as this one can. To find out that someone understands what you are going through, because they've been there. They know what it's like. You have someone to share the weight with, or to take it off your shoulders. It's a sense of relief. My heart breaks for the people that believe that no one knows what they are struggling with. They won't reach out for help, and think that nobody cares.

Someone does care.

That someone fully understands your pain. They know the extent of the heartache, the sadness, the anger that has kept you tangled up all this time. The confusion that makes you unable to understand why this is happening. The loneliness and feeling like an outcast. That someone has been through it all. Has felt everything you have. There is help for you, and it's reaching out with a love more powerful than anything in this world. A love that cares for you with every fiber of its being.

Abba.