Moments

Sometimes, we can be walking along, living our lives, when suddenly, something happens. You know that you will remember that moment for the rest of your life. I went down to my aunt and uncle's house this weekend and decided to take a walk in the woods by their house. I was listening to music, swishing through the leaves, just off my own world. I came upon a trail that ran along a creek bed, and being the curious person that I am, I started to walk down it. The trail dead ends but there is a bridge next to it that goes over the creek and takes you to the playground of an elementary school. There was a gate in front of the playground that was locked, so I just walked onto the bridge a little ways. Halfway across, I stopped dead in my tracks. On the railing of the bridge was a Peregrine Falcon with a mouse in its talons. The minute I saw the falcon, the song I was listening to ended, and everything was quiet. It was like God was telling me to take this all in. We looked at each other for a while. The falcon didn't seem to think I was a threat. I took a picture of it, and left it to eat its meal. While this may not seem like a life changing moment, it reminded me that sometimes the most simple things have the biggest impact. In our society, I think we forget that a lot. Money and material wealth don't satisfy, and never will. We need something bigger than ourselves.

A Shepherd's Staff

My all time favorite song is The House of God Forever by Jon Foreman. He is an amazing song writer, and you can really tell he puts a lot of thought and heart into his music. His faith inspires me every time I listen to his songs. The House of God Forever is basically Psalm 23 set to music. If you're not familiar with this Psalm, here it is:

"The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not be in want. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he restores my soul. He guides me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever."

Of course, I think Jon Foreman's Bible is a different translation than mine because the song isn't this exact context, but the impact is exactly the same. It's beautiful. Calming. Emotional. Strong. Encouraging. Whenever I feel like nothing is going right or things are overwhelming, I listen to this song and every time a sense of peace comes over me. What a wonderful reminder this is. To know that God is always with us through all the bad stuff. He leads us along our journey, and makes us rest. That line really got me. Knowing that he wants to restore us and bring us up. It's such a comforting thought. We are not alone in this life. God's with us all the way. We don't have to be afraid! He knows us and loves us more than anyone. Nothing else matters but this.

Frustration

We all get frustrated. When things don't go our way, a problem we can't solve, (in my case, it would be my math homework), not being able to figure something out. There have been times when I've been really frustrated with people. Wondering if there are still good, decent people left in the world. Sometimes I feel like I have a hard time connecting with people. This week has reignited that frustration. After having a conversation with some acquaintances of mine, I discovered that their moral character was drastically different from what I thought it was. I was very disappointed, because I thought they were better than the people they were portraying through the words they were saying. It caused me to question my judgement of them. Had they been like this all along and I was too naive to notice? I started to lose my faith in people. I just sat and listened. I didn't open my mouth once, all the while growing more and more agitated. I couldn't believe it. How could someone so caring and kind do something so stupid and wrong? It just didn't make sense. I had no comments about what they said; probably because I've never been in any of the situations they were describing, and don't plan to be. I didn't like what I heard. I felt like I didn't have any influence. I was almost afraid to say something. I knew what I wanted to say: "How could you be so stupid?! Do want to mess up your life? You're very different from the person I thought you were. I don't know if I can trust you now." Now, this is the part where I felt like I hadn't made a connection with them. I love talking with people. Listening to their stories, finding out their likes, dislikes, dreams, passions. Really knowing them on a personal level. After talking with these people, I realized there was a whole other level to them that I didn't know about. It was as if it had been hiding, and all it took was one small action to bring it out of the shadows. I was shocked. It was like I didn't know them at all. Looking back on it, I think everyone has different levels to them. Some are happy and want to be seen, others are dark and are kept inside. It takes an enormous amount of trust for someone to show you all of their levels. That really says something if you make that connection.

All Around

This past weekend, I was standing in the middle of a farm field. An oat field, to be exact. I've always wanted to walk through a field like that. I had my camera with me, and everywhere I looked I saw something that I wanted to photograph. The sky was clear, the weather was warm, the leaves were gleaming. It was then that I realized something. You can find God anywhere. I saw him in the sun that lit up the trees. In the green oat stalks that danced in the soft wind. The beautiful painted draft horses in the pasture. It was like God was saying, "Look, I put this here for you. Isn't it lovely? I made it with you in mind." In that moment, I felt so close to him. I knew more than ever that there was a reason why I like photography so much. God showed me it's what I'm meant to do. The peace and quiet of that moment touched my deeply. I love being outside. It's where I get the most inspiration. God's creation continues to blow me away. I think I'll end my entry with that. I hope you can take something from it like I did.

I'll Eat You Up

Tonight, my dad and I went to see Where the Wild Things Are. First off, I grew up on this book. My mom must have read it to me and my sisters at least fifty times. Then when I learned how to read I probably read it fifty more times.I always dreamed of finding the place where they lived. One of my all time favorites. Going into the film, I knew that some parts were going to be different, since it's only a 300 word book, and half the pages are just pictures. Despite that, everything about it worked beautifully together. I really liked how all the wild things had names. It made them seem even more real. It is visually stunning, and the camerawork is amazing. It draws you in and makes you feel like you are part of the film too. After watching it, I can understand how some kids wouldn't understand the film. The story has a deeper concept than any children's book. All the wild things represent a different part of Max's personality. Carol is Max's anger. He doesn't understand why things can't stay the same forever. Judith is Max's negative side. She thinks that things are always going to fail, no matter how hard you try. Alexander is the part of Max that feels like no one ever hears what he's saying. Ira is Max's gentle side. He is the one that steps up when there is a problem and tries to solve it peacefully. KW is Max's caring side. She sees the good in people, but doesn't like it when people change. Douglas is the part of Max that wants to be accepted, so he goes along with whatever everyone does. Through them, Max realizes how he acts isn't right and that he needs to change. He grows up in a sense. Knowing what he has done wrong, he tries to make things better. If you haven't seen the film, I highly recommend it. I hope I haven't given anything away but it is truly a wonderful story. There is a wild thing inside all of us.

Decisions

Today I went on a college visit to Kent State University. Going into this visit, I admit I was a bit apprehensive. Up until now, I hadn't visited a college as big as Kent, and I didn't like how big it was. I was frustrated because my original plans for my major didn't seem attainable. This really upset me. I felt like I wasn't going to be able to pursue my passions. My dreams drive me, sometimes literally, almost every day of my life. I had also heard all of the stereotypical rumors about Kent. I think most of us have heard them. There's the saying "Can't read, can't write, Kent State." I had also heard that it had a bit of a reputation as being a party school. Then there were some students in some of my classes that said they didn't know what to do with their lives so they were just going to go to Kent. Upon arriving on campus, all of these things left me. I saw a campus that had so much to offer me. It's size was not as daunting as I had thought. Talking to various people in my departments of interest made me see how I could make my dreams reality. I can't even describe to you how that makes me feel. It can actually happen! I'm going to do it! They are in reach! All of my questions were answered and then some. It calmed a lot of my fears about going to college. While I know that there will probably be partying at any school I go to, it's my choice about whether or not I participate. And I can tell you right now, it is the last thing I would ever want to do. I have dreams and I don't want to do anything that might jeopardize that. This new part of my life is getting closer every day. After taking in everything, I've decided that Kent is the school for me. It has everything I want. Now I just have to apply! This time next year, I hope to be a Photoillustration major with a minor in writing. Wish me luck!

Tom Hanks!

Yesterday my theatre class went to hear Tom Hanks speak. Actually, it was an interview. We were in the WVIZ/PBS TV station in Cleveland. It was filmed in a TV studio and we were the audience! How cool is that? Scott Simon, who works for NPR and has done hundreds of interviews conducted the whole thing. He asked Tom all about his work and he told us tons of stories about how he got his start and acting in different movies. Two people from each school that came got picked to ask Tom a question. It was so interesting hearing his answers. He is so down to earth and real, which is something that I was so happy about. I was afraid that he was going to be one of those people that puts on an act all the time and can never be themselves, but it wasn't like that at all. He was so funny and was joking around with everyone. He loves to make people laugh. At the end of the interview he took a group photo with everyone. He kept saying funny things and we were laughing the whole time the photographer was taking the pictures. It was truly a once in a lifetime experience, and I got to be a part of it! Since it was filmed for PBS, it's going to be on national television. I don't know when exactly, but they got many shots of the audience during the interview and the camera man filmed my section where I was sitting quite a few times! It was such an honor to listen to a master actor like Tom Hanks.